The death of the 7 in the recent helicopter death that included Kobe Bryant and his daughter, Gianna, hit me harder than I would have thought. I grew up a huge Jordan fan, and although I have always been quick to admit his skill at the game, I just was never a Kobe fan.
I guess you could say, I was a Kobe-hater. You know– how you either love Brady or you hate him?
I am blessed. I have never had to grieve the loss of a family member that has died before their time. I lost a really close friend to a drunken driving accident growing up, but as far as family goes, most of my relatives have lived long, full lives. My extended family, however, has suffered much loss through the death of their first baby to SIDS. I can’t even imagine.
The Kobe thing– learning about what a great father he was and how much he gave back to the community and to sick and dying kids– really made me think- made me question myself. As a small business owner my hours aren’t set. I work a lot. I let days go by where I hardly even have more than a conversation over dinner with my two boys.
But what really hit me the hardest is that I too have a daughter. Her mother and I didn’t make it very far after she was born. When she was young, I wasn’t a good father. I wasn’t there for her as I should have been.
And she is making me pay for it. She won’t even speak to me. Hasn’t in a couple years now. I won’t bore you with the details, but by the time I was mature enough for father hood she was almost a teenager and could hardly care less about our estranged relationship.
So I still text her from time to time- used to be daily, but I never heard back; so I slowed down.
I am looking for advice from all you parents– especially the ones with daughters. How can I show her I love her? What else can or should I do?
Life is precious, and I have more love for her than I do pride for myself. I can already hear my wife telling me not to post this…